It's been almost two years since he has been gluten-free.

I haven't posted it publicly as for some reason, I feared there would be eye-rolling or disbelief. I am not sure why that affected me so much, the fear. Obviously some of our other health or parenting choices haven't. I guess it's because there is a "gluten-free" movement going on... I was afraid that people would judge our decision as if we were just going with the trend or maybe that we would be considered "bad parents" because we resulted to some sort of fad-diet. I don't know.

Then yesterday, I read this article. I started crying because those memories are so vivid. He was out of control. We were out of control, and something had to be done.

I write now, because throughout the past five years that I have had this little blog, it's purpose is just now becoming relevant. Aside from it being our virtual family journal and "baby book", it's become a form of ministry. I've been beating myself up for the past few years that I haven't been more involved in church or starting a home group, or leading this and volunteering for that...truth is, I am laying the foundation for my ministry, which is learning as much about God-driven parenting as I can, through my own little God-given subjects.

I find myself emailing back loads of information to mothers that may be 2,3,4, or 5 kids behind me. Things that I have learned along the way, and it excites me to be able to do that--because I am here, at home with the kids, doing what God feels I should be doing, not what my "guilt" tells me I should be doing.

Which is why I am finally sharing Carter's story.

He has always been a very bright boy. I remember at nine months, him figuring out hinges on doors, being obsessed with our cabinets, gates, anything with a design that causes movement. He stacked cans as early as he could sit. He was easily overstimulated, but other than that, a very mellow boy that thrived on routine and structure.

When I said "no" to him, he complied. Rarely did he even test.
I remember his first meltdown like it was yesterday. That fear of being out of control and trying to stay calm. Back then, I thought it was just a temper tantrum, but now, knowing what we have been through, I have learned it was much more complex.

Since he was my first, there was nothing to compare him to. He was really good boy. He slept A LOT. Fourteen hours at night at times and three hour naps. He loved his sleep and needed it otherwise he just couldn't function.

Until I had my second did I start noticing how reactive he was towards certain things. Almond butter dripping down from his sandwich, freaking out over you rubbing his head, tags in shirts, etc.
All of these things are normal to an extent, but he would get fixated and it took us a lot of work to work through them. Thankfully he was our first as we had the time and patience to do so.

Not until two years did it get noticeable. We were moving again, to the home we live in now, and it required a substantial amount of renovation/DIY work... this meant that we were eating take out a lot. A lot of pizza, sub sandwiches, and burritos.

Between the change of moving (which he never did well with) and the excess wheat that our family was consuming, the meltdowns turned to daily events, sometimes twice a day. These were not 20 minute tantrums. They usually averaged an hour to two hours of non-stop aggressive, violent behavior.
We tried every form of discipline. Charts, solitude, consequences, rewards, etc. Nothing worked.
Jason and I ended every night in tears, we felt so completely out of control, we were at loss.

I started researching (surprise surprise!). Although I never took him in to be tested, mostly due to my fear of him being labeled (which is not a bad thing, but I am just being honest about my fear), different disorders starting poking up, alerting me that my son may be "different". However, the one thing that kept him somewhat void of the typical disorders that I was learning about was his ability to have and keep eye contact and to function easily in social situations. So I knew something else was going neurologically that was very similar to these other children I had been reading about.

Thankfully, I've mentioned before, we live in a very health-conscious, self-taught community. It didn't take long for me to find a few people that had been through similar experiences. One mother welcomed me into her world and her situation, which I am forever grateful for. She lent me a few of her books to read through. I read through all of them within the first week.
I was so fearful. I didn't want to label him. But the books were so clear.
Her advice and council were used in a way that gave me the courage to change some things.

Without giving all of the scientific details, basically most of our bodies were not meant to handle the excess wheat and processed dairy that our society has now labeled "normal"... for certain systems, those that may be extra sensitive, the wheat, dairy, yeast, peanuts, etc. become "allergies", and every time they are consumed, it causes a drug-like reaction. As in hallucinogenic or sensory overload. Which is what was exactly happening with Carter. Things that never bothered him were so intense. Noises, textures, tastes. You never knew what would throw him off. It was then that I learned that I needed to remove all of the things that heightened his reaction from his body.

I was so afraid of what our diet would look like being gluten, dairy, yeast, and peanut-free. That's a long list that seemed nearly impossible to eliminate.

I decided to start with gluten first.
Within two days, he was a different child. Within a week, we had experienced only ONE tantrum. We were astonished...astonished but still skeptical, maybe it was just a fluke?

After such success being gluten-free, we decided to eliminate dairy.
Two mornings after we eliminated dairy, and nine days after we had eliminated wheat, I asked Carter, "How did you sleep?". He answered, with bright eyes, and a huge smile, "GREAT!!!".
This may sound like nothing to you, but for as long as he could answer that question, it had never been "Great", it had always been "not good". I just thought he was a pessimist, I didn't realize he actually didn't sleep well. Every morning after that, his answer was "great".

The diet continued and our happy, enthusiastic little boy returned.
Things started happening that I never noticed were gone...he would hug me and be molding to me, unlike the stiff hugs I had gotten earlier (I just always thought that he wasn't affectionate). He wouldn't react to loud noises in fear. You can rub his head and he says it feels good (before, it would hurt him). Although he needs a little bit of preparation for large crowds and events, he is not fearful of them. The list goes on, and those closest to us and him have noted the amazing difference. You can't deny the miracle.

He is still gluten and dairy free. We have reintroduced yeast and some raw milk and he has done very well with those. I am not sure if this will be a forever diet for him, but for now, we are doing whatever we can to accommodate his body's needs so that he is able to sleep well and function normally. In fact above normally. My intelligent boy.

I'll be honest, it's still hard to write about. We've been through a lot with this and even defending our choices in his diet. But to hug him and for him to willingly hug back makes it worth any type of persecution or high grocery bill, and if you are where we were, I think you would agree!

So I do write this in hope to help. To act as the mother that encouraged me and gave me the tiny push to admit that things weren't right, but that I had the ability to correct them. If you struggle with any of this with a child or even yourself, please do read the following material. It makes so much sense once you do and you can better the life of anyone involved.
If you have been through this yourself, please list any other resources that can help mothers like me!
Thank you!

Resources:
What's Eating Your Child?
Unraveling the Mystery of Autism
(Regardless if your child has been diagnosed with Autism or if there are any other signs, it's a must have if you have ANY food allergy history in your family)
Is This Your Child?