I've been lying in a pool of self pity. Not feeling great, hips widening at lightening speed, heat, and no air conditiong... please join with me as I complain over just how bad I have it.

Thank you for that moment.

I had to look through my photo archives earlier today for something. It was my turning point, which I am oh-so-grateful for.

Admittingly, up until now, I have really been unkown about this "fourth kid" thing. Daddy Mock and I both come from families of five, it's what we know. To add another one in throws off my complete understanding for what is to come. I mean, the birth order, how does that work? My brothers are both so similar to my boys, my daughter, so similar to me at the age, it's been easy to know what's coming next.

But we messed with that. And now I don't know. And I don't like not knowing!

Buut, as I passed this photo, I was brought back to it. In the hormonal state that I am in, it even brought tears to my eyes.

These two are mine. These four are mine. These four.

And like that, I'm at peace.

I can do it.

They can do it.

I will love it.

They will love it.

And this baby is so very lucky to be welcomed by such amazing children.

I'm ready.

On a side note...Honey's hair!!! She's such a toe-head now and all that dark hair, where did it go? Those bright blue eyes, gone, and replaced with such a unique green/grey.

Boy this family sure does embrace change!