The Reality Of It

"It" being that I have come to terms that I may, in fact, be one of those ladies that carries a baby until it's well formed in it's ten pound state (and possible 42 week gestation).

"It" being that I am currently sitting over steaming herbs and water that a dear German doula gave me to soften my cervix. Too much information? Absolutely. My favorite part of this process is that the Jimmy-rigged sitz-bath set up happens to be a bright orange Home Depot bucket with a Pyrex bowl. A ten month pregnant woman, naked waist-down, squatting over it and blogging as I squat. It's a beautiful visual, isn't it? Go to bed with that one on your mind. Guarantees a good night sleep.

"It" being that my regiment to get this VBAC is so entirely filled with selfish tasks, I am feeling a bit negligent to my family. Acupuncture, chiropractic, walks, baths, mental breaks, not to mention the vitamins, supplements, homeopathic remedies... a lot goes into "it"!

"It" being that I feel almost out of my mind at the moment. I haven't blogged in days as there isn't much to blog about. Everything has been centered around this girl. But today I just gave up. Only God knows when she's due to come. He knows her birthday and how she will enter this world. He knows if my desires for a VBAC will be fulfilled or if there are other plans. Either way, I am okay with it. I'm prepared to go as long as I'm allowed to carry her, without grimacing at the thought of potential stretch marks as each day passes. Thanks so much for all the support and calls/emails/Facebook messages I have been getting. It all means so much to know how many people are exciting to meet our Little Miss!